A poem about slugs and snails

I have a problem with, some slug and some snail;
Each time I think I've killed them, it is they that prevail.

They enjoy a meal of fresh orchids;
When I think I've picked them all out, I come to find many more snail kids.

They are especially fond of growing root tips,
growing leaf buds, and beautiful flower lips.

Yesterday I found a new plant, for which they are fond,
when I came home to discover that they'd eaten the head off of a growing fern frond.

My first weapon was Sluggo.
I dispersed it bountifully in the substrate below.
It initially seemed that their population had waned,
But closer inspection revealed the population was sustained.

I next resorted to extensive and meticulous hand picking,
But one month later, with my morale shot, the slugs were still ticking.

I decided, although excessive, I would dabble in dry ice,
But first I performed some tests with gas controlled device.
For 12 hours in pure CO2,
I added some snails, some slugs and a begonia, too.
The snails survived, the dead slugs smelled of ammonia,
And melted from the gas was a former begonia.

I had a new idea, perhaps on the plants not so severe,
How about a slug trap, baited with beer!
I got some small vials, with holes drilled in the sides
Hopefully into the traps, I would watch as a slug slides.

------------------------------------------------

After I wrote that poem, I tried small vials of non-alcoholic beer. It didn't seem to work to well, and I found a frog in the beer cup so I decided to end that experiment. It seems that hand picking is the best way to diminish the population in my experience.


And FYI, a fun paper on the subject can be found here